Being a considerate person makes life much easier. You notice other people, you pay attention to their moods, wants and needs. This does not entail any form of subservience or simpering. You are simply aware. In the here and now. Paying attention. Listening. It is surprising what you notice when you stop your internal narrative and look at what is going on around you.
You may see common ground between you and someone else. Your interests and agendas may not be all that different. Instead of fighting, you could simply talk. Do you need to win? Is it necessary to get your point across? Who cares if the other person does not understand? Instead of getting into a conflict, ask yourself: is there another option?
Friday
Fear
Do you anticipate conflict in your everyday life? Do you live in fear? Is your fear genuine or are you just overly-sensitive?
The problem with fear is that much of it is imagined. People create their own problems by becoming anxious about everyday situations. They blow things out of proportion. They over-react.
Are you holding onto an image? Men puff up their chest and strut around like a rooster in an attempt to look 'hard'. This kind of behaviour is designed to intimidate would-be assailants. It only serves to make the individual look weak, fearful and insecure. It advertises their fear.
No lies. No excuses
It is easy to blame other people for conflict. People instinctively lash out and seek to blame someone else. Try being honest. No lies. No excuses.
Are you blameless? Have you played any small part in creating conflict or were you simply on the receiving end?
Be genuine about this. It is impossible to make progress if you deny the truth. Being sullen and resentful only perpetuates conflict. It is important to find the source of disharmony if you desire to move past it. Being willing to change is imperative.
Thursday
Listening
If we listen to other people, we realise that there are many sides to every situation. It is often possible to avoid conflict.
People do not care to listen these days. They are too busy talking. Too eager to promote their own agenda. Listening is a skill. It requires practice and patience.Disharmony
Conflict typically involves emotional turmoil, anxiety and stress. Is it worth the effort?
Many disagreements are exceptionally petty and essentially meaningless.
Consider: football fans will assault fans of an opposing team on sight.
For what reason?
If one team or the other wins, what difference does it make?
Is the world a better place?
Has a tyrannical despot been overthrown?
Did someone cure cancer?
Have the peoples of the Third World been fed?
When somebody seeks to argue with you, it is important to ask yourself what the contention is really about.
If the disagreement is pointless, is there any reason to get into conflict?
Pride, ego, insecurity, distemper - these are not adequate reason for conflict. They are just excuses.
Conflict
Conflict may occur when there is a disagreement between people. Contradictory values, priorities, beliefs and opinions create contention. Quite often a quarrel of some nature may occur.
Conflicts often involve:
Strong emotions
Fixed standpoint
Unwillingness to compromise
Limited perspective
Stubbornness
Lack of compassion
Raised voices
Verbal, emotional or physical violence
The opposition of ideas can lead to bitterness, hostility and a great deal of upset.
Wednesday
Endurance
Endurance is the capacity to withstand hardship. It is the ability to handle difficulty. To recover from trauma, injury and fatigue.
Stamina
Stamina is the ability to sustain prolonged physical or mental effort; to remain active for a long period of time without fatigue.
Balance
Tai chi students cultivate static balance to begin with. They then work through increasingly challenging forms of movement designed to improve dynamic balance.
Tuesday
Monday
Where is the class?
Community Hall, St Andrew's Church, Station Road, Benton, NE12 8AW.
Please enter via the car park.
Friday
Long-term health & fitness
According to The Blue Zones and The Okinawa Program it is important to think of exercise in terms of what you can reasonably do long-term. We are all aging. This is unavoidable.
The ideal form of exercise is moderate enough that you can do it for the rest of your life. It needs to be joint-friendly, have a low-risk of injury, provide a gentle workout and be sustainable.
On-going health requires on-going practice
A 2-week tai chi taster is nice, but if you want to experience on-going benefits, you need on-going practice. The more often your body undertakes the exercise, the more familiar it will be.
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